Balancing the schedules of my bff and dance show rehearsals has been tough, but it’s done! Yes, the bff who had fallen very ill ended up coming out to stay with my in the hopes that her condition would improve and she’d be able to be in her friend’s wedding (which was the point of the trip, seeing me was actually cheaper for the flight). Except nope! She got here last Saturday and was putting on a good face, but the truth was she was and still is in a lot of pain. Having already rearranged her original travel schedule and making many last minute arrangements to make sure her dress could be altered in time, her condition suddenly worsened.

I won’t even get into the whole seeing a doctor while owning a fat body thing (because WHOA is it a thing!), but she woke me up at 6:30 am Monday morning to take her to urgent care. I instantly jumped into action, dressing myself and grabbing necessary things for long waiting room waits. When she asked that I accompany her in the exam room I was ready for the good fat fight! Turns out she got the same doctor that saw me when I sprained my spine and he was so gentle and kind and really listened to her. I didn’t have to say a word until he remembered me and asked how I was doing. Nice!

More doctors, more waiting rooms, more tests, exams and paperwork and still no answers. Stressful much?! After such an awful morning on such a horrifically hot day (it was 95-102 that day) we headed back to my house for some much needed rest. And then I went and got us some food for dinner that night as neither of us had eaten that day. Bad times. Unfortunately that wasn’t the end of it, but I won’t go into the parts that aren’t actually my business. I will say that she is in a lot less pain today and seems to be improving, but still not able to do much and the heat is not doing anyone any favors.

Mercury being in Retrograde until June 11th? Yeah, we were feeling your affects. Ugh! Communication, technology and travel problems galore! But you know what? I was super glad that she could stay with me without having to rack up awful hotel bills or having to be alone and fend for herself in a strange town. I have been happy to help out and care for her as much as possible. It’s helped me not focus and worry about my own shit and really, I love her so much it’s like ridiculous anyway! So, we’ve not done any of the things we originally planned or wanted to, but we get to hang out together and talk and hey that’s enough, man.

Friendship is different for everyone. Just as our own values may differ from even those we know and love. To me friendship is pretty much the most important thing in my life besides, you know, being my own friend first. I’ve known this particular fatass badass since the old Live Journal Fatshionista days and while we live so far apart, it’s always been wonderful to know that she is only a text or a call away and that we can truly be there for each other and participate in each others lives this way. We care and we show it.

As I get older I am seeing all the time how rare this gift is. Not all adults know or understand how to be in mature friendships. It’s not like in school where you’re just in class together and so you start to hang out. It’s especially hard when I make new friends and they’ve never had a tried and true blue friend like me and they think I’m weird or just insane. Not even kidding, I’ve had friends not even understand why I would want to stay and make sure they made their bus/train/flight because no one has ever done that for them. I don’t get that, but whatever. I don’t know how folks get to be in their thirties and never had a friend who has their back. It’s sad, really. I have been so lucky to have many friendships that have lasted multiple decades. But I’m a weirdo! 😛

While my bff is in great need of much rest for optimal healing, we did manage to get out of the house for some good Thai food for lunch today (my first food pic on Instagram). She then insisted, as we left with full bellies all blissed-out, that we take the following selfies…Ha-ha! She’s so amazing! I am so grateful to have this lady in my life! <3

Tomorrow is the annual Big Moves Bay Area dance show in Oakland and Tigress and I are excited to show everyone our new dance number! I’m not even nervous or worried this year, it’s awesome and strange! Ha-ha! The show itself is called, “Fat Reign” and will be a guaranteed great time! If you’re in the SF Bay Area this weekend, do not miss this show! (Info and ticketing below.) I was just telling a friend, “I don’t do this for the glory! Ha-ha! I certainly don’t do it for attention or fame or whatever. I do it because it’s important to do it. It’s important because that show has inspired me and challenged me to push myself out of my comfort zone and I can only hope that by doing it that someone else will too.” Though I have really had to be committed and push myself to do my self care during the rehearsal process. I’m lucky to have people in my life that check on me about it and my injuries and remind me to be gentle too.

My blog’s Facebook page for things I share that aren’t on this blog:
http://on.fb.me/1A18fAS
I now also have an Instagram, but we’ll see what I put on there:
https://instagram.com/notblueatall/
Info and tickets for the Big Moves show:
http://on.fb.me/1FlmBOR
http://fatreign.brownpapertickets.com/
And as always, feel free to drop me a line in comments here or write me:
notblueatall@notblueatall.com

Rad Fatty Love,
<3
S