You know how it feels when you have things planned out to perfection in your head and then suddenly everything just sort of falls apart? Yeah…THAT! I thought I would have so much time after work to pretty myself up some and well, no! I closed the cafe at 2, headed across the street for a trim and then my wonderful and lovely friend let me borrow a vest for my outfit of awesome. By the time I got home? I had like 30 minutes to shower and get ready. Ack!

My Avenue tights of such high expectations ended up not even going past my thighs (I got a size E for fuck’s sake!) and so that sort of threw me off, too. Luckily my Avenue boots worked out okay. I say okay because they did fit and look great, but because the ankles were so very loose the entire boot ended up scrunched down around my ankles. My husband said they looked fine this way, but they left my ankles sore from the added pressure I guess. I am considering having the ankles taken in somewhere and maybe adjusting the top lacing bit. Oh, yeah…I bought these boots in black. And they fit my 19″ calves! It took a bit of patience and my husband was kind enough to work out the lacing in the back once they were on so that they looked nice (I seriously cannot do it when they’re on and sort of need them completely loosened to zip up the side zipper). In the end I’m glad I bought them, but they’re not my dream boots of radical awesomeness.

So yeah, my outfit didn’t turn out as planned. Also because the vest I had dyed didn’t take the black dye completely. It will require another dye job. *sigh* It’s a lot of work dying stuff, I had no idea. C’est la vie! I made the best of it and while I didn’t have time for the cute eye liner I wanted to do I did dig out my fave glittery eye shadows! Ha! We headed to Oakland for dinner and the Big Moves show.

Dinner was weird. I mean, the food was great (a bit pricey for my taste though) but the bar was closed (transferring their license apparently) and then we had to wait for them to process our bill forever! It wasn’t packed or anything either. In fact it was down right dead. So we ended up being a bit late for the show. We still made it in time to see the show start, but I of course had wanted to mingle and chat with fats. Again, oh well. I did run into two fab ladies that I knew. And the show was good. Not great? No. You see, my two BFFs and I had attended the Go Big or Go Home show a couple months ago and the Fat Fly Girls basically performed numbers from that show, plus one new one (unless I’m wrong). But the belly dancers were lovely and Vicadonia was fabulous as always. I did enjoy it, but the set up was a bit weird because we were sitting at tables instead of auditorium style. Also a lot of the dancing was on the floor level and not on stage so it could be hard to see at times. It was nice to expose my other friends to fat positive things. And the chocolate was Killer! Ha!

After the show half of my group headed home as they had work in the morning. The rest of us hit up a local tea shop to chill out, chat and sip teas! It was nice talking to these two wonderful ladies whom I had grown up with. Yep, we’ve known each other for over twenty years which seems crazy, but they’re rad! Definitely need to do that more often! Before we left, they took this pic of my outfit (pay no attention to my cheesey smile):

As it was cold and wet I did have to wear my Avenue Trench/Raincoat (from 3 years ago, sorry) but the t-shirt was Avenue $9.96! (The t-shirt was dove grey with black and silver glittery beading on it.) The vest was borrowed, but from Torrid and the skirt was a tube dress from Target clearance last year for $4! The clutch is actually Avenue, too. The the necklace says FAT in Fame-like lettering that I got on Etsy for $10! Sorry, it doesn’t show the boots on me.

And this lovely lady was in the display window of the antique shop we took my pic in front of.
Just thought she was cool:

All in all it was good fun. Plan or no, I enjoyed spending time with my fave peeps and seeing a big fat show to celebrate my birthday instead of a party! Ha!

Today actually is my birthday. I don’t like to have a fuss made over me because of it and so I don’t have that on my Facebook at all. I was surprised that my business neighbor bought me a gorgeous balloon bouquet of blue stars and rainbow-heart butterflies (how did he know me so well?) and a card and a happy birthday banner…my customers keep asking who’s birthday or how long ago my birthday was. Ha! When I say it’s mine, today, they just look confused. I just hate fake or obligatory greetings/offerings/etc. I feel like the people who should know do and that is that. I am so very grateful for all that I have and wouldn’t change it for anything. Please don’t take offense, it’s not a big deal for me anyway.

I’m not yet sure I’ll be celebrating it today at all. Saturday was the true celebration. I may have some wine or something. I may go to karaoke and get faced…I don’t know. Today feels weird to me for other reasons, too. Just not feeling like my bubbly self. Woke up too early from a night of fitful sleeping. Woke up the puppy by going to the bathroom at 5am and thus my husband got up to walk him and seemed fairly grumpy by the time I saw him after my shower. A friend asked if he had anything planned for me tonight and I was taken aback by that. Not sure why. I guess because, well, I love my husband and think the world of him, but I also think he’s going through something internally right now and isn’t ready to come out of his shell. In other words: No. I doubt he’s planning a thing and that’s fine. Ha-ha!

<3
S

Tonight we’re heading over to California’s Great America for their Halloween Haunt and I’m a little anxious.

I haven’t been to a haunted house type thing since I was like 10 or so. It was a recreation center thing and my fave aunt was participating. I don’t remember what scared me so, it wasn’t overly professional or anything, but when I was outside upset, my aunt came to console me and I didn’t recognize her at all! She was dressed as a scary witch, I think. Ha!

This one is professional, and not cheap, but my lil sis gave us tickets and so I couldn’t refuse (she and her husband work for the Haunt every year). I’m excited, but nervous. Also, I sort of want to try to go on rides, but the whole publicly fat thing plus my BPPV (benign for of vertigo) makes me a little apprehensive, too. Ugh!

I haven’t been to CGA in ages. Funny, too because we’ve lived like 2-3 miles from it for the last 11 years! Last I went was with a bunch of friends after 8th grade graduation. Ha-ha! But I’m willing to suck up my fears and possible embarrassment to have a great time with my favorite people. I mean, I still get that initial jolt when I see a huge spider in my apartment, but now I don’t scream for it’s execution & removal. We just relocate them now (mostly my husband, but sometimes I get the courage to do it myself, too).

What do you get anxious about? Have you faced your fears?

Tough economic times call for creativity and using all resources possible! How does this relate to fatshion? How doesn’t it?! Ha-ha! Yesterday I decided to finally dye the vest I bought two weeks ago at Avenue to complete what I’m dubbing “The Ultimate Outfit” (though it won’t be complete without the right knee-high boots, but that search is still in progress). You see, I found the right style vest at the right price, but the color? Meh. The vest was $6.96, how could I pass it up?! So I bought a bottle of RIT black dye and gave it a go! (I have never dyed any garment before, other than tie-dying which is different all together since you’re going for more color/designs/etc.)

The vest’s original camel-khaki color:

As I was about to dye this vest I went to my dresser for a shirt I wouldn’t care if it got stained. I first chose this top I got at Torrid a couple of years ago and looked at it and though, “Why don’t I wear this? I love this shirt!” Then I realized that it had a stain. Boo! So I grabbed two identical shirts from the same drawer and they, too were stained. Y’all! I don’t have to tell you about staining t-shirts on the frontal-chestal area, do I? I believe it’s a fairly common thing with everyone, but especially those of us gifted with larger boobages (I am using all sorts of made-up words today). Anyhoo, I decided I needed to save these shirts from their previously considered destiny: Cut into rags for cleaning! Oh Noes!!!

I headed out to my current sewing station (I’ve been making aprons like crazy for an upcoming craft show) and laid out my supplies and planned my next course of action. Dye? Appliques? Iron-on transfers? Check, check and check! I turned on the iron and filled my bucket with hot-hot water, a cup of salt (my vest was a cotton-linen blend and the bottle said this would help) and the bottle of dye. I first soaked the vest itself in hot water and then lowered in into the bucket-o-blackness. Doing this caused a mini-splash onto my aqua t-shirt and I realized, “Hey! I should just dye this, too, probably won’t see the stain anymore!” And whipped it off my person and into the bucket it went, too!
Supplies:

So much stirring!

30 minutes of stirring followed by many-several changes of water (have to keep agitating and then mild detergent and more water changes until the garments rinse clear) and finally my vest and t-shirt were ready to lay flat to dry. (I must note here that I chose not to use rubber gloves for two reasons: my husband had mysteriously thrown mine away and the dye was washing off my hands just fine at first, until? Well, see the pics!) After that I tackled the two remaining shirts. One got a neat-o iron-on transfer that covered the little stain it had perfectly, I think. And the other got some embroidered appliques ironed-onto it. Now I haven’t worn any of these yet, but I think they’ll look fairly if not entirely cute with these little upgrades. And the “Ultimate Outfit?” Well, I’ll just have to leave you in suspense for a bit, my dears. That will be for another day/week. =0)

Two tops saved (the black swirlyness at the right is what I ironed-on):

The “Corpse Hands” as my husband has dubbed them after the dying:

What creative or resourceful way have you saved something from the garbage or rag bin? Tell me about it! =0)

I had planned a more visually appealing/grabbing  Body Love Attack (as announced here http://bigfatblog.com/body-love-attack), but the trees outside of my cafe? Well, I just wasn’t sure how to attach the hearts to their branches without a lot of equipment. Ha! Go figure, poor planning on my part. But I did use the hearts in the way I intended originally, which is to share positive messages with people walking by or into my cafe.

On the back of every heart I wrote, “Love Your Body Just As It Is” I’ve already had people stop and read & smile at me!

One of my friends stopped by and said, “Oh I Love this! These hearts are great!” and I gave one that said, “You Amaze Me!” to her little girl. She left smiling from ear to ear! This is such a great thing! I love doing this. And the sign on my door about weight diversity? Fabulous! When my friend started to mention doing a body wrap with a friend I smiled and gestured to the sign, and she smiled back and said, “Oh don’t worry, I’m doing for the pampering and not for any sort of body issue.” I do love her. =0)

What are you doing for Love Your Body Day???

ETA: My business neighbor, man in his 70’s reads the sign on the door about weight diversity and says to me, “Oh good! Most people don’t know what the hell they’re talking about anyway!” referring to the no diet talk. Nice! Later he reads some of the hearts out front on my flower cart and comes back and says, “Those are really neat! I promise to love my body, okay?!” Too funny!

Go here…NOW: http://bigfatblog.com/body-love-attack