Halloween used to be my favorite holiday of the year. Still is I guess, in some ways. I love creepy and cool and spooky things. I love Halloween parties, no matter who is throwing them. I love dressing up. I love the unexpected. I love the crisp autumn air. I love the creativity that comes from this time of year. I love thinking up new costume ideas or finagling my own way to something recognizable, too. I don’t go too into the make up side of things, even on Halloween, but I enjoy what others do and I toy with it occasionally. I love that surprised look people give when they see who is under the mask, so to speak.

One year I dressed as a biker dude and my best friend didn’t even recognize me. I loved that. I had side burns and a mustache and a bandana on my head and a leather vest over a flannel. It was fabulous. My husband was a biker chick that year. He had boob made of water balloons filled with peach jello. They were awesome and delicious and much fun was had with those and that night in general. That may have been the night my BFF Jery and I had a lot of Cuervo Black and Pepsi…but I don’t really remember. Ha-ha!

Being faced with the inevitable, “What are you dressing up as?” question is always a struggle. What is fun? What is surprising? What is affordable? What is easy to throw together? How much time do I want to invest in this? UGH!!! So much to consider, right? It can be easy, I can always manage a decent Hippie costume. I’ve had a “Serial Mom” dress in my closet for a few years and have never worn it. I have the remnants of my lady Zorro costume in the closet, too. They all seem easy and doable and fine. But this year? This time?

This week was supposed to be awesome. I won’t lie, it has sucked pretty hard. Nothing I can do about that now. But tonight I am going to a costume themed night at Full Figure Entertainment’s Full Figured Friday event. I was going to be Lady Zorro again, but then I was like, “A mask and my glasses? What the hell?!” Finally last Saturday I was telling my husband how I wanted to be excited about dressing up. I wanted to be something fun or unexpected. He suggested I pull out my old “Naughty School Girl” costume. I had completely forgotten about it. And I was instantly excited!

You see, my friend Jeanette is going as a “Naughty Nun” and the school girl would be the perfect compliment to her costume. Also, I don’t have to buy anything but socks! I can handle that. And I suddenly exclaimed, “I can be sexy, too!!!” Because for some reason I hadn’t felt terribly sexy in a long while. And after the shit week I’ve had, well, I’m ready to be sexy on my own damn terms. I am sick of wanting/waiting for someone else to make me feel sexy, or wanted, or desired, or whatever. Fuck it!!! I am going to have fun tonight and if anyone has a problem with that they can kiss my giant ass!!!

I’m not dressing sexy for anyone else but me. I rarely wear anything remotely risque, except for the occasionally too-low cut top and even that is rarely intentional. I’m not out to gain male attention. I’m married and fine with that. I’m not looking to make anyone else feel bad or to objectify myself or anyone else. I just want to feel good and have fun and dance my pants off…oh wait! I won’t be wearing pants! WOOT!!! I’m not defending the abundance of sexy costumes or the societal pressure to dress that way. I support each individual’s right to choose whatever the hell they want. For me, this year? I just want to feel and look sexy in my own eyes!

I can’t promise pictures, but I will do what I can. ha-ha! Hope you have a fun and fabulous weekend on your terms, too.

Today’s Tank Top Tuesday submission comes from Deeleigh  (of Big Fat Blog fame). She says that this is a draft entry for the NOW Foundation Love Your Body poster contest. http://loveyourbody.nowfoundation.org/posters/contest.html

So yeah.  Not only am I wearing a tank top in this picture, I’m wearing one
that’s too tight and that accentuates my belly rolls.  I’m also wearing an
extremely short cotton jersey skirt.

Normally, I’m not that much of a rad fattie when it comes to clothing.
Okay, so I do wear sleeveless tops on a pretty regular basis. I’ve also been
known to wear mini skirts, but only with boots and opaque leggings or
tights.  I am actually pretty careful not to offend people’s sensibilities.
I dance around the “inappropriate” line and I don’t call attention to my size.

A too-tight tank without a bra and with a tiny skirt and no leggings is
definitely over that line.  So, even for a fat woman who is actually not the
world’s shyest, this is really daring for me.

There’s a method to my madness.  I took a series of photos of myself exactly
as described in the text.  No makeup, no attempt to hide “flaws,” no attempt
to play down my size.  I tried to choose lighting and poses that made it
clear that I was fat and that my body wasn’t perfect, but that didn’t quite
cross the line into being ugly to an average viewer.  I wanted to create an
image that would be perceived by most people as beautiful rather than
grotesque, but that didn’t look anything like what we see in entertainment
and advertising.  Of course, some people will have been deeply influenced by
media images and will find it ugly.  I’ve got some other photos I could use…

I guess I’d just like some feedback from the community.  Is the photo doing
what I want it to do?  Any suggestions on the graphic design?  Is the
poem-thingy a good idea, or is it too long or too precious?  Don’t worry,
I’m not particularly attached to any of it, and I’m totally open to
constructive criticism.

I am taking submissions from anyone who wants to exercise their right to Bare Arms for future Tank Top Tuesday posts! Email your pics here: notblueatall@notblueatall.com, please include the name you’d like in the post, a blog or etsy shop you wanna plug, your thoughts on bare arms or other fatty philosophies. It does not have to be in a tank top, so long as your arms are bare. Have fun with it!

Also, feel free to still treat comments as TMI topic/discussion/venting area! Feel free to ask TMI questions or just vent/rant about your own stuff. I love it! We all do! =0)

This was my message from “The Universe” this morning and I would love to discuss this with you all:

When you look into the mirror, do you look for what you love most?

Do you look for me?

Do you smile?

Did you just ask, “Is there any other reason to look into a mirror?”

Smartie,
The Universe

I’ll admit, I do often smile in the mirror. Sometimes it’s only to check my teeth, other times though it is to actually smile at myself. I love to make faces though, too. I always check my hair, eyebrows, stray/crazy-hairs…but sometimes I just look to check in on myself or to see what I’m putting out there. What do others see when they look at my face? What am I projecting?

I’d love your thoughts, habits, etc…on this subject. Fun, no? Ha-ha. Thanks.

This picture has been floating around ye olde web here for awhile and today my friend Carol Squires inspired me:

“Wow, just think how much fun it would be to make thousands of these and then plaster them in women’s bathrooms in schools, clubs, dressing rooms, any place we can. I want one for my home mirror. INNDD project?”

My response?
“Love that idea! May just have to make it a mission!”

And then I looked up a recipe for wheat paste and created a printable version so I could get a bunch on a page (email me for the word doc)…it just so happens that I was watching something on street art the other day and some famous artist mentioned a new product that could apply paint for street art and I thought it would be perfect for wheat paste application, too! (It’s like a small squeeze bottle with a sponge-wheel applicator at the top.)
Anyway, I think I will make this a mission of mine: to paste this message in as many places as I can.
I am not yet sure if I will document it somehow, but I will do it and will gladly talk about it!

What do you think? What would you think if you came across this message somewhere?

What other awesome things can we do like this?

Lay it on me!

<3

ETA: Or something more like this? I want lots more suggestions!

This week’s Today’s Tank Top Tuesday post comes from Bri of www.fatlotofgood.org.au! I’m not sure anyone could look happier in a picture:

“The pic is of me (Bri) and my daughter Ruby (now aged 5 in 2 weeks but was 3 1/2 in the pic). We went for a summer’s day drive in the hills about 30 mins away from where we live here in Australia and we ended up at a swimming hole which was where this pic was taken.

Prior to discovering Fat Acceptance I pretty much only wore arm-baring clothing when I was at home or sometimes when camping. If I wore such clothing in public I always wore a shrug or some such.  Nowdays I wear bare arms wherever I feel fit! I am currently working on a tattoo design for my upper arm which will give me even more of a reason to bare arms!”

Cheers,
Bri

I am taking submissions from anyone who wants to exercise their right to Bare Arms for future Tank Top Tuesday posts! Email your pics here: notblueatall@notblueatall.com, please include the name you’d like in the post, a blog or etsy shop you wanna plug, your thoughts on bare arms or other fatty philosophies. It does not have to be in a tank top, so long as your arms are bare. Have fun with it!

Also, feel free to still treat comments as TMI topic/discussion/venting area! Feel free to ask TMI questions or just vent/rant about your own stuff. I love it! We all do! =0)

Today’s Tank Top Tuesday post comes from